Sunday, August 16, 2020

I cannot believe my one month difference. Weight loss

I cannot believe my one month difference. Weight loss
I cannot believe my one month difference. I’ve literally battled my weight for a decade now. I’ve tried every diet fad, killed myself doing workouts that my body wasn’t quite ready for, and gave up so many times because I never got the results I wanted. This time I’ve made things easier, or really my circumstances made things easier lol. First I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism to go along with pcos, ra, and a slew of autoimmune conditions I’ve had for over a decade. Then, I broke my ankle, severely injured my knee and hip, and it stopped me in my place. I’m recovering so the only exercise I’m approved for is walking. Sooooo.... I walk. I walk between 6-8 miles a day and I do chair exercises and ab workouts that don’t involve my legs. I got rid of bread, pasta, rice, etc. Pretty much just eating fruits, veggies, lean meats, and some dairy. Drinking a ton of water. And not obsessively logging my food anymore or obsessively weighing myself. Now, I do keep a mental note of how many calories I’m eating. It’s just that I’m trying to target my problem areas, one of those being that I obsess so much about calories that I scare myself away from eating enough, if that makes any sense. So I wouldn’t lose bc I wasn’t eating enough. Then with the scale, I’m only weighing once a month bc I become obsessive with that as well and I end up sabotaging myself.

The biggest challenge and change is rewiring my brain and my toxic relationship with food. It’s always been my emotional crutch. So much that I developed a binge eating disorder. I can proudly say that I haven’t binged in one month which is absolutely amazing for me. I’m listening to my body cues of when I’m hungry and before I eat I ask myself if I’m hungry bc I’m hungry or if it’s bc I’m bored or emotional. Asking those simple questions have really been the greatest tool and has helped me back off of going into a bender multiple times so far.

I’m sorry this is so long, but it’s just so important to note that weight loss and gain is such a mental battle. For me, it’s probably a harder battle than the physical aspect. I’m seeing a psychologist who specializes in eating disorders and a nutritionist. I’m meditating and doing yoga. I’m journaling about my food and how I feel before, during, and after.

This past month Ive lost 12lbs. All together I’m down 36lbs. It’s been a very eye opening month. It’s challenged me in ways it never has before. And so far I’m not even close to giving up. These small changes are making huge improvements and I can’t wait to see what I’m capable of next.

To everyone trying to lose weight, keep going. This is an uphill battle, but we’ve got this! We can do this. Just remember everyone’s battle is different. We’re all on different boats, but we’re braving the same ocean. Keep trying new things. Don’t be afraid to start slow and at the bottom. As JK Rowling said “And so rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life” 💕

SW:315 CW:278 GW:160

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